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Week Ending: August 20th, 2011
Truck(s) Featured: Amsoil Shock Therapy (Jon Zimmer)
Video Type: Fan Video
Courtesy: www.YouTube.com
Description: Great freestyle run from Jon Zimmer in Amsoil Shock Therapy as he takes the win at the Montgomery County Fair in Gaithersburg, Maryland.
Event: O’Reilly Outlaw Nationals
Venue: Ottawa County Fairgrounds
Location: Miami, Oklahoma
Date: June 17th-18th, 2011
Host: Ross Z. Bonar
Videographers: Kaedon Berry
Lineup: Avenger (Jim Koehler), Barbarian (Devin Jones), Bounty Hunter (Jimmy Creten), Brute Force (Jerry Perry), Crashmaster (Jeremy Perry), Iron Outlaw (Jay McPherson), War Wagon (Andy Hoffman), Wrecking Crew (Steve Koehler) [Read more…]
Event: Monster Truck Summer Throwdown
Venue: Monroe County Fairgrounds
Location: Monroe, Michigan
Date: August 5th, 2011
Photographer: Paul M. Harry
Lineup: Amsoil Shock Therapy (Jon Zimmer), Avenger (Jim Koehler), Bounty Hunter (Ben Winslow), Brutus (Chris Bergeron), Excaliber (Kevin Koszala), High Maintenance (Jocelyn Perrin) [Read more…]
Event: Mighty Monster Truck Tour
Venue: St. Joseph County 4H Fairgrounds
Location: South Bend, Indiana
Date: August 6th, 2011
Photographer: Paul M. Harry
Lineup: Cyclone (Chuck Sisson), Mongoose (Brian Watros), Rap Attack (Dave Rappach), Shell Camino (Shelley Kujat) [Read more…]
Bounty Hunter – Jimmy Creten
Captain USA – Jeff Bainter
El Matador – Daron Basl
Iron Outlaw – Ben Winslow
King Krunch – David Smith
Maverik Monster Trakkar – Ron Duncombe
Red Baron – Darren Migues
Scarlet Bandit – Dawn Creten
Snake Bite #14 – Larry Swim
Summit Bigfoot #16 – Dan Runte
Bounty Hunter – Jimmy Creten
Summit Bigfoot #16 – Dan Runte
Summit Bigfoot #16 – Dan Runte
Bounty Hunter – Jimmy Creten
Avenger – Jim Koehler
Brutus – Chris Bergeron
Circle K Thirstbuster – Rich Hilgendorf
Equalizer – Mike Hawkins
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Hot Tamale – Troy Rose
Mopar Magic – Morgan Kane
Samson – Dan Patrick
Stone Crusher – Steve Sims
War Wizard – Randy Moore
Hot Tamale – Troy Rose
Avenger – Jim Koehler
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Excaliber – Kevin Koszala
Mongoose – Brian Watros
Shell Camino – Shelley Kujat
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Bounty Hunter – Jimmy Creten
Captain USA – Jeff Bainter
Red Baron – Darren Migues
Scarlet Bandit – Dawn Creten
Red Baron – Darren Migues
Red Baron – Darren Migues
Bounty Hunter – Jimmy Creten
Chalkboard Chuck – Dave Rife
Lucas Oil Stabilizer – Bobby Holman
Outback Thunda – Clive Featherby
Star Marshal – Dave Radzierez
Outback Thunda – Clive Featherby
Outback Thunda – Clive Featherby
Ground Pounder – Chris Ryan
Razin Kane – JR McNeal
Stinger – Zane Rettew
Triple XXX: State of Destruction – Chrissy Moler
Triple XXX: State of Destruction – Chrissy Moler
Ground Pounder – Chris Ryan
Ground Pounder – Chris Ryan
Triple XXX: State of Destruction – Chrissy Moler
Ground Pounder – Chris Ryan
Ground Pounder – Chris Ryan
Illuminator – Jay Snyder
Triple XXX – R.B. Moler
Virginia Giant – Diehl Wilson
War Wizard – Randy Moore
Virginia Giant – Diehl Wilson
Barbarian – Devin Jones
Rislone Defender – Zach Adams
Summit Bigfoot #16 – Dan Runte
Strait Jacket – Kevin King
Summit Bigfoot #16 – Dan Runte
Summit Bigfoot #16 – Dan Runte
Summit Bigfoot #16 – Dan Runte
Barbarian – Devin Jones
El Perro Loco – Rod Wood
Obsessed – Eric Swanson
Obsession – Rick Swanson
Play’n 4 Keeps – Tony Canedo
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Obsessed – Eric Swanson
Obsession – Rick Swanson
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Chalkboard Chuck – Dave Rife
Dragonfly – Kyle Carrington
Lucas Oil Stabilizer – Bobby Holman
Star Marshal – Dave Radzierez
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Ballistic – Mac Plecker
Desperado – Drew Haygood
Full Boar – Ed Eckert
Predator – Allen Pezo
Pouncer – Lenny Kuilder
Predator – Allen Pezo
Predator – Allen Pezo
Predator – Allen Pezo
Ballistic – Mac Plecker
Desperado – Drew Haygood
Full Boar – Ed Eckert
Predator – Allen Pezo
Pouncer – Lenny Kuilder
Predator – Allen Pezo
Predator – Allen Pezo
Ballistic – Mac Plecker
Desperado – Drew Haygood
Full Boar – Ed Eckert
Predator – Allen Pezo
Pouncer – Lenny Kuilder
Predator – Allen Pezo
Predator – Allen Pezo
Evolution – Goob Sutton
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Nite Stalker – Dalton Van Skyhawk
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Black Stallion – Mike Vaters
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Iron Warrior – Trey Meyers
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Black Stallion – Mike Vaters
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Black Stallion – Mike Vaters
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Iron Warrior – Trey Meyers
Razin Kane – JR McNeal
Higher Education – Jimmy Tracey
Black Stallion – Mike Vaters
Black Stallion – Mike Vaters
Week Ending: August 13th, 2011
Truck(s) Featured: Bounty Hunter (Jimmy Creten)
Video Type: Fan Video
Courtesy: www.YouTube.com
Description: Jimmy Creten burns it down to end another great Maverik Clash of the Titans weekend at Rocky Mountain Raceway. Dan Runte in Summit Bigfoot #16 swept both racing competitions, but Creten dominated freestyle for the win as seen here.
Event: Monsters of Destruction
Venue: Trail of Tears Lodge & Resort
Location: Jonesboro, Illinois
Date: July 29th-30th, 2011
Videographer: Colby Marshall
Lineup: Amsoil Shock Therapy (Jon Zimmer), Big Dawg (Dale Gerding), Excaliber (Kevin Koszala), Heavy Hitter (Derick Anson), Quadzilla (Roger Gauger), Tail Gator (Doug Noelke) [Read more…]
Monster Truck Radio With Host Jeff Richards
Date: Monday, August 8th, 2011
Guest #1: Glenn Harris, owner of the World’s Largest Street Legal 4×4
Guest #2: Derrick Anson, driver of Heavy Hitter [Read more…]
El Matador – Daron Basl
El Toro Loco – Marc MacDonald
Grave Digger – Pablo Huffaker
Grinder – Lupe Soza
King Krunch – David Smith
TMNT – Aaron Basl
El Toro Loco – Marc MacDonald
El Matador – Daron Basl
El Toro Loco – Marc MacDonald
Grave Digger – Pablo Huffaker
El Toro Loco – Marc MacDonald
El Toro Loco – Marc MacDonald
El Toro Loco – Marc MacDonald
Grave Digger – Pablo Huffaker
El Toro Loco – Marc MacDonald
TMNT – Aaron Basl
El Toro Loco – Marc MacDonald
Grinder – Lupe Soza
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Avenger – Jim Koehler
Bounty Hunter – Ben Winslow
Brutus – Chris Bergeron
Excaliber – Kevin Koszala
High Maintenance – Jocelyn Perrin
Bounty Hunter – Ben Winslow
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Avenger – Jim Koehler
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Avenger – Jim Koehler
Bounty Hunter – Ben Winslow
Brutus – Chris Bergeron
Excaliber – Kevin Koszala
Brutus – Chris Bergeron
Brutus – Chris Bergeron
Avenger – Jim Koehler
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Bounty Hunter – Ben Winslow
Excaliber – Kevin Koszala
High Maintenance – Jocelyn Perrin
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
High Maintenance – Jocelyn Perrin
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Excaliber – Kevin Koszala
Amsoil Shock Therapy – Jon Zimmer
Airdog Diesel – Michelle Simpson
Chalkboard Chuck – Dave Rife
Heavy Hitter – Derrick Anson
Lucas Oil Stabilizer – Bobby Holman
Star Marshall – Dave Radzierez
Stomper – Joe Nichter
Lucas Oil Stabilizer – Bobby Holman
Lucas Oil Stabilizer – Bobby Holman
Heavy Hitter – Derrick Anson
Heavy Hitter – Derrick Anson
Bad News Travels Fast – Bruce Haney
Gun Slinger – Scott Hartsock
Instigator – Lionel Easler
Lone Eagle – Lenny Kuilder
Reptoid – Jim Jack
Bad News Travels Fast – Bruce Haney
Gun Slinger – Scott Hartsock
Black Knight – Brian Kenney
Monster Patrol – Charlie Miller
Outback Thunda – Clive Featherby
Outlaw Clydesdale – Bennett Clark
Pouncer – Dale Mitchell
Predator – Allen Pezo
Predator – Allen Pezo
Black Knight – Brian Kenney
Outlaw Clydesdale – Bennett Clark
Predator – Allen Pezo
Black Knight – Brian Kenney
Predator – Allen Pezo
Bounty Hunter – Russell Steeley
Iron Outlaw – Andrew Peckhum
Play’n 4 Keeps – Tony Canedo
Titan – Donald Epidendio
Titan – Donald Epidendio
Titan – Donald Epidendio
Dragonfly – Kelley Carrington
Evolution – Goob Sutton
Nite Stalker – Dalton Van Skyhawk
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Evolution – Goob Sutton
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Twisted Dragon – Rob French
Ballistic – Mac Plecker
Barbarian – Devin Jones
Rammunition – Mat Dishman
Razin Kane – JR McNeal
Barbarian – Devin Jones
Rammunition – Mat Dishman
Rammunition – Mat Dishman
Incinerator – Ryan Rice
Martial Law – Paul Strong
Mechanical Mischief – Jim Burns
Xtreme Eagle – Jon Anderson
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Excaliber – Chris Lagana
Ground Pounder – Chris Ryan
Samson – Dan Patrick
Tail Gator – Doug Noelke
Ground Pounder – Chris Ryan
Tail Gator – Doug Noelke
Excaliber – Chris Lagana
Excaliber – Chris Lagana
Samson – Dan Patrick
Samson – Dan Patrick
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Hawg Wild – Jim Mace
Monkey’N Around – Steven Hill
Outtacontrol – Michael Phelps
Strait Jacket – Kevin King
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Ghost Ryder – Larry Quick
Aftershock – Bob Robbins
Illuminator – Jay Snyder
Krazy Train – Roger Cardot
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Airdog Diesel – Michelle Simpson
Chalkboard Chuck – Dave Rife
Lucas Oil Stabilizer – Bobby Holman
Rap Attack – Dave Rappach
Star Marshall – Dave Radzierez
Tie – Lucas Oil Stabilizer – Bobby Holman
Tie – Airdog Diesel – Michelle Simpson
Lucas Oil Stabilizer – Bobby Holman
Star Marshall – Dave Radzierez
Cyclone – Chuck Sisson
Mongoose – Brian Watros
Rap Attack – Dave Rappach
Shell Camino – Shelley Kujat
Mongoose – Brian Watros
Shell Camino – Shelley Kujat
Mongoose – Brian Watros
Shell Camino – Shelley Kujat
Bounty Hunter – Darren Migues
Desperado – Drew Haygood
Rislone Defender – Zach Adams
Stinger – Zane Rettew
Bounty Hunter – Darren Migues
Desperado – Drew Haygood
Stinger – Zane Rettew
Fired Up – Chris Tjernagel
Time Flys – Kelvin Ramer
Triple XXX – R.B. Moler
Triple XXX: State of Destruction – Steven Thompson
Triple XXX – R.B. Moler
Fired Up – Chris Tjernagel
Time Flys – Kelvin Ramer
Triple XXX – R.B. Moler
Triple XXX: State of Destruction – Steven Thompson
Time Flys – Kelvin Ramer
Evolution – Goob Sutton
Nite Stalker – Dalton Van Skyhawk
Reptoid – Jim Jack
Reptoid – Jim Jack
Reptoid – Jim Jack
Reptoid – Jim Jack
Week Ending: August 6th, 2011
Truck(s) Featured: Toxic (Travis Petri)
Video Type: Fan Video
Courtesy: www.YouTube.com
Description: Great freestyle run from Travis Petri and Toxic at the Chemung County Fair.
Event: Monster X Tour
Venue: Vanderburgh 4H Center
Location: Evansville, Indiana
Date: July 15th-16th, 2011
Videographer: Chris Parrish
Lineup: Black Knight (“Hillbilly”), California Kid (Bill Payne), Quadzilla (Roger Gauger), Rock Star (Bill Payne) [Read more…]
(Union, Missouri – JS Productions LLC PR) – This weekend JS Productions, LLC will be bringing Monster Trucks to Mineral City Speedway in Fort Dodge, Iowa! Four of the nation’s top monsters will be competing in wheelies, racing and freestyle Saturday night and Sunday afternoon, August 6th-7th. The trucks in action will be none other than Ground Pounder, Michigan Ice Monster, Tail Gator and Samson. Along with the monster trucks come see the intense action of modified and stock tuff truck action and democross.
Samson and Tail Gator headline the lineup of monsters coming to Fort Dodge, Iowa.
Tickets are $10 for children and $20 for adults. Event times are 7:30PM on Saturday, August 6th and 2:30PM on Sunday, August 7th. Be sure to join us for the Pit Party both days, 5:30PM on Saturday and 1:00PM on Sunday. Pit party admission is $5.
For more information on this weekend’s big monster truck event at Mineral City Speedway, visit www.jsproductionsllc.com.
Photo By Jason Bryan, Courtesy JS Productions LLC
Event: Monsters of Destruction
Venue: Trail of Tears Lodge & Resort
Location: Jonesboro, Illinois
Date: July 29th-30th, 2011
Photographer: Danny Maass
Lineup: Amsoil Shock Therapy (Jon Zimmer), Big Dawg (Dale Gerding), Excaliber (Kevin Koszala), Heavy Hitter (Derrick Anson), Quadzilla (Roger Gauger), Tail Gator (Doug Noelke) [Read more…]
Event: Monster Jam
Venue: Paul Brown Stadium
Location: Cincinnati, Ohio
Date: July 23rd, 2011
Photographer: Paul M. Harry
Lineup: Air Force Afterburner (Damon Bradshaw), Avenger (Jim Koehler), Backdraft (Jeremy Slifko), Brutus (Chris Bergeron), Captain’s Curse (Alex Blackwell), El Toro Loco (Marc MacDonald), Grave Digger (Dennis Anderson), Grinder (Lupe Soza), Lucas Oil Crusader (Linsey Weenk), Maximum Destruction (Tom Meents), Monster Mutt (Rod Schmidt), Son Uva Digger (Ryan Anderson) [Read more…]
Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen, to the “Blast from the Past’ blog where I, TMB Videographer Colby Marshall, review classic and especially not-so-classic shows from the glory days of monster truck competition. I’ll be doing this in a light-hearted, playfully sarcastic manner so don’t take offense, and let’s all sit back, have a few laughs and remember the way things used to be.
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!!! Or, I should say OH MY! Look, its Ken Broo! He welcomes us to “The Big A” in Anaheim for USHRA’s 1989 stop (YouTube would be a good place to look if you want to follow along).
Wait, what the holy heck is that thing?!? Its the legendary Orange Blossom Express monster tank train thing. Joining Ken Broo will be Mike Galloway, who is riding shotgun (assistant conductor?) with Allen Gaines. Ken Broo lets loose the most dispassionate “Oh my.” I have ever heard. This was, of course, half a sentence…”Oh my, I am watching my career circle the toilet with this one.” Mike Galloway jumps down and says “HI KEN!” as they embrace. The gaze into each other’s eyes that they share is just long enough to make me VERY uncomfortable. California being a progressive state and what not, I decide to just move on. In the background, Allen Gaines and the greatest hair in the history of the world climb out onto the tracks of OBE. He perches up there like Poe’s Raven or something. “Nevermore will I be taken seriously for building this abomination”. We find out that there will be two brackets of racing…one with Monster Trucks, the other with Monster Tanks. Winners face each other. (Hold on as I flip my sarcasm switch to the on position) OH YAY! Another of THESE battles. Next…wait…no way…OK, I couldn’t make this up. A train passed my house just as OBE pulls away and Ken Broo sends us to a commercial break. It must be a sign that I chose the right event…
Or maybe not.
We come back from commercial as Mike Galloway attempts to explain the complex braking system on the brand-spanking-new AM/PM Rocket. Apparently, the output shaft feeds into this top loader rear end that has a rotor that spins under a caliper…WHAT THE &%$# ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!? Next, he decides it is time to describe the rear steering system. It turns using an extremely sophisticated toggle switch that is an extremely simple solution to turning the rear tires on these trucks. OK, now my head hurts. A lot. Big truck with big tires crushes small car. All I need to know, Mike.
Ken Broo describes the track next. Now, with the history of events in Anaheim, this is no easy task. Ken decides its time to make a play for the Baseball Tonight staff, and he proceeds to tell us that they start at home plate, race up the foul lines over a set of cars, then turn in center field and go over another set of cars.
Two on, two out in the bottom of the third as Hot Stuff and AM/PM Rocket come to the plate. Debbie Rhoden will take on Jim Ries. Rocket was brand new here, and Debbie Rhoden had fairly recently taken over the Hot Stuff ride. Ken Donat, just off screen, seems to have forgotten his flags this time around. He raises his hands and drops them Pinks-style. Unlike last time we saw him here on the Blast From the Past, he has found a relatively safe spot from which to start the trucks. We are progressing. Debbie Rhoden singles into left field and tears off down the first base line. Jim Ries, having never seen baseball, apparently, heads up the third base line. Rhoden gets all squirly as she trips over the first base bag, and gets it up on two wheels. Ries capitalizes and and heads across the large dirt mound out in, well, center field. Guess I shouldn’t have given ol’ Kenny-boy a hard time about that one, eh? They are about even coming into the final turn, but Ries makes one of the best turns I have ever seen, and takes the win as he crosses the final set.
Wait, wait, wait…looks like I spoke too soon about Ken Broo here. Allow me to bring to you his color commentary contributions to the previous race…
“Whoa.”
“Oh my goodness.”
“Oh my goodness.”
“Oh man.”
“Oh man.”
“Oh my goodness.”
All of this, of course, is going on under Mike Galloway’s ramblings about the race. I wonder if Ken Broo, when he goes home at night after his current job as a sports talk guy in Ohio, goes into a full body shudder and has nightmares of calling these shows.
Well, we go back to the batter’s box, and Bigfoot 7 is lining up against…AM/PM Rocket? Apparently, “The Wrangler” was supposed to race Foot here, but broke or something. You know the Wrangler as High Voltage, which was apparently new for this show, or so I have heard. Either way, we go straight to the Monster Truck final, as Jim “Chuck Norris” Kramer takes on Jim Ries. Those amazing on-screen graphics tell us that Bigfoot 7 weighs in at a svelte 23,000 pounds. Bigfoot 5 would like to have a word with you, Mr. ESPN Tech Director. They take off, with Kramer taking the early lead. However, unlike Bigfoot 4, numero 7 can’t handle the awesomeness that is Jim Kramer, and begins to smoke badly. Kramer, apparently hindered by that pesky not being able to see through the smoke thing, has trouble with the final turn. Ries, on the other hand, makes another epic turn in Rocket. Ries clears the cars and….OUCH!!! He augers the truck right into the side of one of the dirt hills and folds up the front end. I am fairly sure that didn’t buff out. Looks like Ramen noodles for a month for everyone at Golden State, because that has to be a rather pricey repair. We cut to a shot of a smoking Bigfoot 7 (say no to smoking, kids) as the announcers tell us that Kramer won the race. We will address that misconception shortly. But first, we dust off the old VOICE BASSIFIER AND REVERBERATOR 9000 , because it is time for…
KEN BROO’S LIFE LESSON OF THE NIGHT!!!
“There’s a lesson. Never give up, even when, ya know, it doesn’t look great.”
There you have it, folks! KEN BROO’S LIFE LESSON OF THE NIGHT!!!
We go the the replay of the last race. Mike Galloway tells us that “Jim Ries made a good jump.” Only if you like $15,000 repair bills, Mike. He then tells us that they have just received word that The Rocket won that race. Keen Broo is incredulous, wondering how that could be if he…but Galloway cuts him off. You see, Mike guesses the finish line must be at the end of the cars. Wow guys, thanks for that information we could have used, oh I dunno, at the beginning of the darn show! Ugh. Lets just go to the bloody tanks…
We have Ernie Brookins in Trak Attack taking on Phil Tonseth in California Gold. Apparently, California Gold was completed at 3PM that same day. Glad to see USHRA booking trucks on speculation. Galloway runs down the list of specs on Trak Attack, including the Lenco Air Shift transmission. Up in Champaign, Illinois, Tim Hall just smiled. Hi, Tim!!! And, like many of Raminator’s contests, this race wasn’t even close. Cali Gold tries to bunt in a home run hitting contest. Brookins just owns him, but not before darn near endo’ing a tank. No easy task. Tons of smoke fills the inside on Trak Attack, as Ernie lifts the body and asks for some Cheetos and a hot dog.
We shows shots of the crush cars next, as Galloway and Broo make the requisite jokes about the first one being Ken Broo’s rental.
Up to bat next are Bigfoot Fastrax and Orange Blossom Express. RBC himself, Bob Chandler, taking on Allen Gaines. Truly a battle of legends in their respective sports. That said, Allen Gaines isn’t participating in his sport, now is he? No, he has a train…with tank tracks. Maybe Ernie Brookins shared some of what he was enjoying in that last race with Allen, and out of his head popped this idea. Only thing that makes sense to me. Well, here we are, many bags of Cheetos later, and the race begins. Any sense of euphoria for Mr. Gaines quickly turns into an absolute terror. It looks like Bobble head night in Anaheim, and he gets tossed around inside. He appears to have no harness and be sitting on top of a recently-sprung Jack-In-The-Box. OH NO!!! OH NO!!! HIS HEAD FLEW OFF!!! THE MAN’S HEAD FLEW OFF!!! Wait, it was just his helmet. Meanwhile, RBC is way out ahead and, despite some trouble on the last turn, takes an easy victory in this race. Mike Galloway chimes in at this point. “I’ve gotta say Allen Gaines is a winner tonight.” Yep, except for the whole losing thing. The ONLY way that Allen Gaines won tonight is if he has stock in Tylenol or something. I have had some pretty abusive hobbies over the years, but that run had to hurt something fierce in the morning. Lets just go to the tank finals, shall we?
Trak Attack and Bigfoot Fastrax are ready to go. Galloway informs us that both are based on Korean War-vintage M55 Retriever chassis designs…woof. Donat drops the arms and off we go! Immediately, the windshield on Trak Attack fogs up. You are such a hippie, Brookins! Chandler takes a sizable lead, but again has trouble with the final turn. This allows Brookins to groove his way across the final set first, and take a far out win. So, that sets up Teak Attack and Bigfoot 7. AM/PM Rocket is obviously done for the night after that wreck. But wait, it appears that Trak Attack is broken, as well. “Broken”, of course, being slang for arrested for possession. Ken Broo makes the brilliant analogy that this is like the Miss America pageant, where the winner can’t fulfill her duties and the first runner-up takes her place. Ken, I know both Jim Kramer and Bob Chandler. And, while they are fantastic guys and great minds, I swear that if either of them ever won Miss America, I would go ahead and immigrate to Tajikistan.
So, we have an all-Bigfoot final round. RBC pinch hitting for Brookins, taking on Kramer, who is pinch running for Ries. Next is the swimsuit competition. Kramer absolutely eats Chandler alive on the start line, as RBC takes a break to count his millions of dollars from inventing a sport. Despite this, Chandler makes a great run of it, catching up with Jim Kramer. Little known fact about Jim Kramer is that he was born in a log cabin that he built with his own two hands. (Thank you to Mrs. Kramer for that one) It is a close race at the line, with Galloway saying he thought Fastrax took it. Jim Kramer throws his hands up, asking a track official who won the race. He knows…
Its Bigfoot 7 taking the win by the slightest of margins. RBC springs forth from out of nowhere to shake Jim Kramer’s hand. Seriously, he just sort of appeared with some Matrix-style move straight on to the left front of 7. Probably the most impressive move of the night. Ken Broo sends us away, informing us that this was a presentation of Bud Sports through the facilities of ESPN…but that is not watch grabs my attention. No, that honor goes to the Roman numerals telling us the year of broadcast…MCMLXXXVIIII?
Oh, Mr. ESPN Tech Director? Your middle school social studies teacher would like to review your Roman numerals answers with you.
Well, off to the TV station for another day of work for yours truly. Until next time, OLD SCHOOL RULES!!!
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